Mothering without your mother
I see your heart full and also broken too. I see you struggling with the weight of mothering without a mother but also the bond that you now share forever with your mother by being one yourself.
I'm here to tell you that you will find your way. Together with your babies you will heal a hurt heart and find joy in their innocence and infinite cuddles.
There will be times you will struggle with your new role and the responsibility. These will be the hardest times where you will search deep within your soul for the answers and what your mummy would have said. What she would have done? How she might have dealt with the situation? You will find your way. You will find a new way. With memories of your own happy childhood and an approach to parenting that is individual to you and your husband and to your two firecrackers. And my goodness will you have so much fun along the way as you find this new way.
You will laugh, you will cry, you will shout, you will hold little hands in your own and the rest of the world will become insignificant in that moment, you will make up little songs to get them to sleep and you will make up little dances to get them to eat, you will be silly, you will be strict, you will be you and you will be mummy. You will feel strong again! You will sleep again. And you will always miss your mummy but you will hold her love for you so dear and she will live on forever. Your kids will even call her angel Grandma and when they see a white feather they will mention her before you do. Open your eyes and see the magic everywhere.
Stay strong mama. Love, laugh, live and be kind to yourself. Parenting is hard and mothering without your mother is like no other.