Based in Sydney, Australia, Foundry is a blog by Rebecca Thao. Her posts explore modern architecture through photos and quotes by influential architects, engineers, and artists.

Twin isolation

Twin isolation

hi mama, 

They always say there’s one thing your never really prepared for.... twins. But what it should actually read is the twin isolation. 

During pregnancy there’s no end of offers of help once the babies come, it’s all very exciting a twin pregnancy. Fast forward and it’s a very different story..... 

You genuinely feel blessed and thankful every single day and feel privileged to have joined the very exclusive club that is being a twin Mum. There’s no invites, you just got lucky! 

You still marvel at the fact that your body made not only one but two babies AT THE SAME TIME. You were lucky enough to carry them to a full 37 weeks, we didn’t have any special care requirements and you had the natural labour you wanted. We went home the following day, family complete.

And actually with two older boys at home you felt quite prepared, if not a bit scared.

However there’s another side to it. The loneliness and the guilt ridden side that no one really warns you about. 

In the early days when you would have to listen to one crying while you (bottle) fed the other (don’t even start me on the guilt of not even trying to breast feed the pair of them, breast is best and all that!) or when they both started to cry you struggled with how you choose which one to attend to first?! 

Thankfully seven months down the line, you can now generally avoid this by being prepared with regimented feed times. Regimented times that don’t allow for much fun stuff in-between. 

That’s when the guilt rears it’s ugly head again, for not doing the day to day activities that you did with your singletons (a word you don't even know exists yet!)

We would go to regular baby groups, swimming, days out, the usual mum and baby things. But add two babies into the mix it becomes a different story. 

Swimming lessons are impossible one pair of hands, two babies, the math just doesn’t work. 

So baby groups...... like minded parents right?! No pushchairs allowed in the centre, you are yet to try carrying two car seats complete with 17lb of baby in each. And why are they always at feed times?! You do manage the local one with a small group once a fortnight. 

You're yet to find a local supermarket with a twin baby trolley yet. They are the stuff of folklore between twin mums. Home delivery is your saviour, and the fact you're on first name terms with the local delivery man says it all. Thanks Peter! You won't be able to get your pushchair into smaller stores, coffee shops and restaurants, no ladies that lunch here! 

It was only when talking to your partner that you realised it had been 2 weeks and the only time you'd left the house or seen anyone other than him was on the school run for the elder ones. So thank goodness for that really. 

That’s when it hit you though, that being a mum of twins is isolating and quite lonely at times. You had underestimated just how lonely it would be. 

The fact you have two beautiful babies to spend everyday with compensates for all of it. And a great friendship group that come to you when you can’t get out. This stage won’t last forever, things will get easier as they get bigger and their routines change. 

So for now, enjoy them being babies while slowly going insane singing the Iggle Piggle song, puréeing fruit and veg while your brain gets mushed also. Be grateful to the 5 minute chats in the school playground just to confirm you can still hold adult conversation. Just!

 You can follow Sharon on Instagram -  @2babies_boekestyn .

You can follow Sharon on Instagram - @2babies_boekestyn.

So many people affected by miscarriage. And now you.

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